I don’t know know how your July went reader but mine was WILD. I literally committed myself to so many different things. Not only did I decide to participate in the #MJConsistencyChallenge (which was a struggle and a half all on its own), I also signed up for a MF Fitness Pod by @MakingMila (who I talked about the blog recently), also decided on my own that I was going to make it my personal goal to close my apple rings every day by working out EVERY DAY, and to top it off, my law school related demands became even more…demanding haha. This month literally spread me as then as possible…AND THEN SOME.
I think it finally hit me last night as I was trying* to go bed but couldn’t because I had a super intense chest pain. Luckily for me, it was on the right side of my chest otherwise I would have thought I was having a heart attack and the idea of going to an ER during these times would have really had me stressed. I couldn’t sleep until like 5am and then I was woken up by my family being loud at like 8:30am. This would have been fine but I couldn’t go back to sleep and it was the “straw that broke the camel’s back”…it’s me y’all…I’m the camel.
My anxiety was in overdrive and I couldn’t deal. One of my best friend’s called me to ask me if I ever finished my goal setting session. I asked if I could call her and I just start sobbing once we started talking about how I was feeling. I had so many feelings and I knew I wasn’t going to be able to finish my research by today’s deadline and would have to ask for an extension…I felt embarrassed and ashamed. However, my best friend told me there is no reason to be ashamed if you’re having a rough mental health week. She said if I needed an extension because I had a fever it would not be a big deal and this was the same.
I’m so glad I called her and I’m so glad I asked for an extension. I know it sounds like my month was horrible, but it wasn’t! As overwhelmed as I was today and probably the last few weeks, I’m also happy I was able to keep some of my promises to myself this month. I was able to be consistent. I strengthened my blogging muscles and now I can write a blog post in like 15 mins as opposed to the sometimes hour or two it would take me before. We truly love to see it!
My main point of this post was to tell you (as always) to take care of yourself. Learn how to deal with your bad days and extend yourself grace but also have pride in the little things you’re able to accomplish. I’m proud of me and I’m proud of you too!
How did your month go? Let me know in the comments!
One thought on “Mara’s Musing: Reflecting On This Past Month”
Im always my worse enemy and make myself more anxious and then I spiral from there. Love that you had a homie to call and help you gain more perspective 🙂